Belong

The worst thing that can happen to an adolescent is to fall out of their peer group. Evolutionarily speaking, that meant almost certain death. Fortunately, things are different now, but our emotional system still sees it as a very serious threat. It is a myth to think that whether or not being left out of the group depends on school performance. Young people who are socially well-liked by their peers are more likely to receive more respect, rather than less, if they get good grades. Achieving poor results is not seen as a problem in a peer group as long as you do not get yourself into big trouble through your own actions. On the street, whether positive or negative, school performance plays even less of a role. A much bigger problem is if a young person from the peer group shows deviant behavior. In that case, if he or she gets good grades, he or she will be seen as a nerd, but if he or she gets bad grades, he or she will be seen as a loser. There are students who consciously get worse grades with the idea of ​​belonging more. That is almost always an illusion. This is seen as deviant behavior and such a person is quickly ostracized. Someone who loudly declares on the schoolyard or in the auditorium that he likes to acquire knowledge and that he or she simply enjoys learning, also runs the risk of being excluded. Getting an 8 on a test is fine, but bragging about it too much is not appreciated. Adolescents are constantly balancing on a fine line between belonging and not belonging. Figures play a subordinate role in this. What matters is whether your behavior is appreciated by the peers around you.